Lake

Italy lost against the Netherlands.
As reaction I sold my car.

And went walking,
on
and on.
The sun was setting
down.
end of the day
I crossed a river,
walked along a shore,
and the path ended
down
on a lake.

I looked at the waters,
dark
and calm,
extending to places I will never be in;
So I smelt the wind
and listened to the drake
imagined
how it would be there:

notes
falling from a piano
and a pull
from below
intensity
there's no space
for words there
and no need too
everything's real
so REAL
in the place I imagined

Lake turned green
eye of a fay
or maybe blue
I can't remember;
I stepped into the waters
despites all promises
step-by-step
up to when I could let go
up to when it wasn't safe anymore
and did not hurt

At night
back on the shore
I looked up
confused
short of breath
my legs freezing
trembling
for no matter how calm
the waters are
I will never
ever
reach that place.