Intolerant

Too much sunlight today. I better use my sunglasses. But if I do, they are too dark. I cannot tolerate too much light, as I cannot tolerate too much dark. I can tolerate less and less these days. Mediocrity above all. Zero tolerance for mediocrity. Except my own mediocrity. As in Het Vergeten Seizoen, a wonderful book, probably the best dutch novel of the year, I find justifications for my own weaknesses, I found reasons for my failures, I overestimate my fears and my capacities. Last weekend I was in Austria, spectator of a wedding. I realized it was an unique moment, all friends together drinking bear and eating schnitzel; and I realized I was not anymore the centre of the Universe, the world did not turn around me, my jokes weren't funny. What a liberation!